Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
