I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Randomize
