scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
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