my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
