if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
