Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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