She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
it's like heaven, but drunker
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
