no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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