dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
