i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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