dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I understand Curling. That high.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
