We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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