i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
