dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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