we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
My vagina just recognized that song.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Randomize
