you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
