We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so let's talk penis.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
