paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
