It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
