RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You're a waste of cheezeits
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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