it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
