Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Drunk is a universal language darling
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
