i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Are we still banned from the library?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
