i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
And the cops told us we were all naked.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
