What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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