Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
