Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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