Me. At least after what I've been through.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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