At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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