apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
