its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
