Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
