Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
