did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
