Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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