Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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