All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
