everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
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