did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
She bit a glass in half.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
