if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
