You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
