we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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