I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
