Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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