if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Randomize
