I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
What did we do last night that was yellow?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize