Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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