I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
