i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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