I want to walk on stilts...naked
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
wow bdsm is so cute
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
